what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
