Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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