He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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