TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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