First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
