Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
