we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Randomize
