I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
