have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Randomize
