My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
