Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I believe in your delicious
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Randomize
