you mean i was at the winter classic?
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
