Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
