i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
