He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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