I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
