Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I enjoy the company of your penis
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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