what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
