Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
