margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
She announced her abortion via fbk
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
This is classic penis vs brain.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
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