I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
