oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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