my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
ttyl tear gas
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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