He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
