I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
