i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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