Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
