i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
