I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Dignity is for republicans.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
