Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
