gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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