So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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