Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
