What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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