I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
And the cops told us we were all naked.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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