sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
