I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
