i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
