After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
