we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Randomize
