Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
