Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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