I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
