Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
