Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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