That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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