I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
