i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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