you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
