She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
